Things to do if you really want to help a new mama

Me and little baby T, only a few weeks in!

Being a new mother is hard work. It’s endless sleepless nights, sore body parts, raging hormones, mixed feelings about food and tons of guilt. At least it was for me. But it’s also a beautiful and critical time where this new mama gets to spend time and bond with her precious baby. Those moments in the first few days, weeks and months, are ones that can never be regained.

It might seem pretty simple to come over for a short time to say hello and meet the new little one, but it can also be a stressful time for a mama. She might feel physically or mentally ill but is too shy to tell you, because she knows you have good intentions.

When I had my first baby I wrote a post about visiting etiquette. If you’re new to visiting newborns, or you just want to see if you’ve been doing it courteously this whole time, check it out.

When you go to visit, if you bring a gift, make it something immediately useful like healthy food, diapers or amazon gift card. The family likely has all the clothes, gadgets and toys they need since they’ve been preparing for months. Better yet, ask what you can bring!

If you really want to help a mama out, and depending on how close you two are, don’t ask to hold or spend time with the baby, do some of the following:
• emptying and filling the dishwasher;
• folding, putting away laundry and doing another load;
• sweeping, vacuuming;
• putting away toys;
• Getting the mail;
• Taking out the garbage;
• Watering the plants, cutting the grass
• Taking care of any pets: refilling food, emptying litter boxes or walking
• Asking how they and really listening as you pour them a coffee or make them a tea.

Don’t forget to play with the other kids! They need some extra attention as mama is probably giving a lot to the new baby.

This list may also be helpful for some of those new father’s or grandparents out there who just aren’t sure about what they should be doing! Of course, you’re going to want spend some cuddle time with your new family member, but please, don’t hog the baby!

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